Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Canine Voting Rights - Two steps forward, one step back


The state of Washington has grudgingly permitted Canine-Americans to register to vote.  That’s one down, 49 states to go, before we will have the full equality accorded even the most loathsome, dog-abusing humans.  What the state of Washington is doing is to be commended as a step in the right direction, for sure, but it is by no means perfect.  You see, only dogs who have these IDs get to vote – a ‘voter ID’ law.  I don’t know if this is a deliberate attempt to continue to disenfranchise dogs or a misguided effort to protect against unfounded accusations of canine voting fraud.  If the latter, then I don’t think these state officials know what a burden it is for some of my kind to get an ID.  First, places to get IDs are often miles away and it is hard for us to get there.  Dogs can’t drive standard automobiles because our hind-paws can’t reach the pedals.  Only the richest 1% dogs are able to afford specially equipped canine-friendly cars.  Second, sometimes they make you pay for the IDs with money.  Again, only those 1% dogs, like those with trust funds, have ready cash.  Most of us dogs are paid for our good deeds in kind, with things like bologna and toys, which would not be accepted as legal tender.  So I’m glad that Duncan is able to vote.  He looks like a good dog who will make wise decisions.  But what about the rest of Washington’s dogs?  Are their barks not to be heard?

4 comments:

  1. How old is Duncan anyway. You have to be 18 to vote. That's right in the Constitution.

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  2. Dear anonymous,

    You neglected to factor the 'dog year' multiplier. Once Duncan's age is properly adjusted, he is comfortably above the consitutional minimum.

    Tommy

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  3. Dog years are not referenced in the Constitution, you moron.

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  4. Tommy,

    I have been out of the country and only now have read this post. I'm shocked. Customarily you are nonpartisan, sometimes siding with Republican idiots, sometimes siding with Democratic idiots. This time, however, you are advocating a blatent power grab by the Democrats. By and large dogs are welfare/charity recipients. They earn very little, but expect--even demand--that everything simply be handed to them in a silver feeding bowl. Duh! Contribute little or nothing to the economic wealth of this country, but demand a share of the pie? Can you think of any better description of a Democratic voter. Republicans refuse to willingly share what this great country has given them, but at least they aren't leeches. So how's this, Tommy? First earn a living. Then demand the right to vote.

    Martin

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